So my beautiful friend gave me a book, Bedroom Feng Shui. Actually she gave it to me almost 2 months ago before she went back home to Spain. Anyway, I dug it up and have started using some of the suggestions. I am proud to report that the 'self-diagnosed' plantar fasciitis is MUCH better! It turns out that my side tables, next to the bed were shooting poison arrows and intersecting at my feet region. The poison arrows, according to the book, were produced by the corners on the end tables. The simple solution -- besides getting rid of them -- was to place any extra pillows between the bed and table -- specifically at the bottom corner closest to the bed. I am happy to report that I have noticed a difference! I have now decided that I need to 'tweak' some areas in my bedroom. Most recently, I straightened up the 'relationships' area. I am ready to tell the Universe that I am indeed ready...for the right thing, of course.


Recycling in general is a wonderful thing. However, when it comes to education, it has become an industry. You see, if you take an old idea, give it a new name, and get super jazzed about it, some big wig education dude -- or dudette -- will get excited and book you for a seminar. Yes, this has happened in my district. The new term is...Gradual Release of Responsibility. Now, I assure you that I released most responsibility in my classroom years ago! I am NOT one of those coddling teachers that babies children and does everything for them. In fact, I am quite the opposite. So I received an email about another inservice...you know how much I LOVE those things <insert extreme sarcasm> I will say that two of the days I am interested in. It will be on a new writing program that the district is implementing. The third day is this 'gradual release' bullshit. I did a little research on it -- may the Universe bless Google! It is an old idea with a new make-up job. It's a 'regifting' sort of thing. In a nutshell...it's recycling old ideas! Why is it that education will accept any crap that comes up? It's not like it even needs solid research behind it. That's what kills me about education, you can show it a jazzy improv show and it eats it up! So needless to say, I"m not attending that day. I will spend it in my classroom. A much better use of my time. 

We begin with the creature that scared the shit out of me at 2:30 in the morning...a possum! They are some noisy ass climbers. I was sound asleep when I heard a massive ruckus outside. I was sleeping with the slider open as it was a nice, cool evening. I mean, who doesn't like to be all snugly warm and have the cool air on your face as you sleep? At first, I thought someone had snuck into my backyard, then realized that it was an animal crawling along the back fence. So, I got up, turned on the light -- remember, I have self-diagnosed plantar fasciitis, so I am hobbling around like a drunkard -- and watch an ugly ass creature with a rat-like tail climb down one of the trees (it rests along the back fence). I then begin watching it with fascination as it sniffs along the grass. Then...I remember the doggie door! So now images of this thing crawling into the house, walking around the house, Samson and me barricaded  in the bedroom while I call 911 rush through my mind. Let's face it, Samson is a wuss and runs away from cats. What the hell's he gonna do with a real wild animal. So I run -- ok, quickly stumble -- down the hall to the side slider (where the doggie door is located) and close it. I continue watching the possum for a few minutes...they sniff a lot! It then found some apples that fell off my tree and started chomping them. I then lost him -- or her -- on the side of the yard where there is no light. And there was no way in hell that I was going outside just to see some stupid creature.


The person who designed textured walls is an idiot. The person who decided that said textured walls should be installed in homes is an ASSHOLE!! I have been painting my new corner office. I decided that it would be nice to paint it a light blue with one accent wall of a darker blue from the same paint strip. I have learned that painting a light color of stupid, fucking textured walls is waaay easier. Why? Because you can't see every single little pocket that you may have missed. Oh, and  these stupid walls allow cob webs to grow and prosper. WTF??? I have better things to do with my day than to take down cob webs from textured walls...Assholes!


Finally, I am a sucker. Yes, there is a large blinking neon sign on my forehead that only friends who sell crap can see. If you invite me to a party -- tupperware, candles, makeup, etc. -- I will buy shit cuz the pitch gets me. So knowing this I go into these fucking parties with the mindset, "I'm here for free food, maybe free shit, but I'm NOT buying anything." And every time I walk out having ordered some shit. So, it happened again this week. A good friend of mine invited me to one of these parties -- oh, yeah, and let's not forget they ALWAYS want you to become a pusher like them -- and yes I walked out having ordered a ton of this shit. This friend knew that I liked organic stuff and it was a party for organic cleaners, vitamins, and other products. I will say that after doing some research there were very few negative things said about the product. Don't get me wrong it's one of those pyramid schemes where if you become a pusher -- they call them agents or sales reps. -- you earn money and the more people you can get to become pushers you earn more money. So while I constantly walk out of these parties ordering a ton of shit, I NEVER agree to become a pusher. I have to say though, when I have bought shit it has all turned out well in the end. But still...I have that damn sign on my forehead!!! Oh, and I will keep you posted as to the effectiveness of the crap I bought. I secretly hope it's good.

I am pleased to report that my gout or plantar fasciitis is not, I repeat NOT affected by red wine. Whew! I was worried there. Do to my dedication to science, I decided to test out my theory...I drank red wine. Remember, it's all in the name of science. I was pleased that the next morning my heel was not quite as bad as the morning I walked around like a drunken 90 year old. I know you were all worried about this. 

Along the wine theme, the strangest thing happened yesterday. So for the last few days I have had workers at the house fixin' stuff. I had the pest control guy come out...interesting character who I will talk about -- or not -- in a bit. I also had a landscaper dude come out and fix my fence. Nice guy, does good work; I've worked with him in the past so I'm cool with him. At the end of the day yesterday -- day 2 of fence/gate fixin' -- he made some joke about beer. Apparently his helper made a crack about how a cold beer would be good about 'now'. Which I totally understood. They had been working in the sun and heat all day. Sometimes, I'm too honest for my own good...I replied that I had wine, but no beer. The guy who wanted the beer proceeds to ask what kind of wine and of course I answer -- honestly 'cuz I don't know when to shut up -- red and white (which was chilling in the fridge, yup, told them that too). I must really learn to shut my mouth! Somehow it came about that he would take some red. Now, to be honest I may have offered -- it's how I am. Seriously, some strong duct tape might do me some good! Thank goodness it was 2 buck chuck! So, yes I poured the wine for them -- in classy red plastic cups! Between the two they drank almost the whole bottle. I think they were done, or almost done, with the work. Seriously, it was a very surreal experience. And yes, I would -- and will -- hire him again to do work for me around the house.

I am all too aware that I am a healthy young woman. However, there are times when something goes wrong with my body and I assume I have some strange disease or ailment. To date I have had -- in my 'OMG, What the hell is going on?' moments -- tumors, heart disease, arthritis (some doc says I do have this....bummer), thyroid issues (still suspect this one), pulled muscles, have started menopause, going blind and a host of others. Currently I have been having issues with my right heel. Each morning when I get out of bed I have trouble walking. It really hurts. Some days are better than others. And within a few minutes I am fine -- or as fine as I'm ever going to be. So this morning I really couldn't walk on the foot. I was hobbling around worse than a drunk 90 year old. Now, I have never actually seen a drunk 90 year old -- most family members don't live that long -- but I have a vivid imagination. So I thought to myself, "What the hell did I do to make it worse today then ever before?" The answer...red wine. Okay those of you who know me, know that last night was NOT my first drink of the 'All Healing Liquid', but it did get me thinking. I may not have plantar fasciitis like I originally suspected, it could be GOUT! Now, in all actuality, I will be fine in a month or two...all my ailments fade when I get bored with them. I'm like an 8 year old, ADD kid with a new toy. And in all likelihood, it is probably related to stress. That seems to have been the theme for me within the last year. I mean, I couldn't even move my right arm up and down for several months due to stress. Although my original prognosis -- my own prognosis -- was a torn muscle.


Okay, I just looked up gout....it's in the big toe. But whose to say that it can't move to the heel? 


So tonight was the Farmer's Market. My lettuce guy was there...thankfully. He really is a cutie...and WAY too young . However, to his credit he was reading a book on Karma and positive and negative energy. I did chat with him for a few about Law of Attraction, Ester and Jerry Hicks, and Wayne Dyer. That's all I got folks.